july 30, 2019. 0732 hrs
it was thursday morning.
we were going to have surgery to a pregnant mother of one daughter. yolk
sac tumor had been recognized spreading to liver and certain level of
abdomen. we predicted this gonna be a long day: cesarean section
continued with debulking and another debulking of a recurrent cancer of
uterus.
cesarean section went pretty smooth. we got the
baby out, he cried out loud. we stitched, bleeding from our knife were
controlled.
but it was pool of blood piled up. we sucked
the blood, for 3 second the operating field was clean, but the the blood
rose and stagnated. tumor implants were seen all the way from top to
bottom. i told myself, the baby wont see her mom. the abdomen then
packed with gauze, hoping the blood would clotted themselves. 7 hours of
surgery.
we were just pushing our luck to the edge. mother died 12 hours after surgery.
we had only around 30 minutes to drink, eat, and pray while the nurses get the next patient ready.
the
surgery that just about to performed was rather big and the operator
was rather: the master. he delivered the baby of president's grad son.
how cool.. but it wasnt that. for us, the surgery had to be conducted
well. at the exact time, it wasnt so sweet, a lot of sighing, swearing,
chuckles of disappointment.
every surgery has the
pearls. this one of my favorite moments. 6 hours of surgery, exactly in
front of me the most respected consultant, with me the trainees that has
been showing the beauty of meticulous movement, revealing other side of
obgyn i had never discovered. they can still be humorous and at moments
prior surgery, they are pious. they were emotionless on the table,
passionate and perfectionist.
my respect and appreciation to dr gatot purwoto, dr kade yudi, dr brian, dr anindhita, dr renardy reza, dr indiarto.
emotionless residents and trainees
11/7/19 07.25
i was having a discussion with my husband last night during our way to home after he picked me up at the hospital.
i frankly told him that is there anyway to be a person that is attractive enough to other people to be willing to open up to me, choosing me as a person that definitely would loved to hear their stories. do we have to have other criteria, other than being sincere?
hospital routines has been tiring, weary as other would have the same exact opinion. people are connected by rational reason, treating patients with knowledge and practice skill. people, some, have an easy going characteristic, fun to mingle with. while others, have firm wall beyond their personal. they know what is their priority, they know answers that has been expected, they dont pay anytime in other section outside rational thinking.
but yet, we are all human being. we definitely have that emotional thinking. i wish i could be one other friend that is able to sneak up in everybody's human being side.
if it is rational relationship, people tend to leveling themselves to their counter person. if it is emotional relationship, it is almost impossible to achieved such thing in setting of hospital and PPDS life.
isnt it fun to have sense of yourself having a part in other's daily life? and they are recognize your presence emotionally, as other human being and being open up.
i would love to sneak up to those emotionless residents and trainees, knowing their hidden side that contributes to their excellence and dedications.
i was having a discussion with my husband last night during our way to home after he picked me up at the hospital.
i frankly told him that is there anyway to be a person that is attractive enough to other people to be willing to open up to me, choosing me as a person that definitely would loved to hear their stories. do we have to have other criteria, other than being sincere?
hospital routines has been tiring, weary as other would have the same exact opinion. people are connected by rational reason, treating patients with knowledge and practice skill. people, some, have an easy going characteristic, fun to mingle with. while others, have firm wall beyond their personal. they know what is their priority, they know answers that has been expected, they dont pay anytime in other section outside rational thinking.
but yet, we are all human being. we definitely have that emotional thinking. i wish i could be one other friend that is able to sneak up in everybody's human being side.
if it is rational relationship, people tend to leveling themselves to their counter person. if it is emotional relationship, it is almost impossible to achieved such thing in setting of hospital and PPDS life.
isnt it fun to have sense of yourself having a part in other's daily life? and they are recognize your presence emotionally, as other human being and being open up.
i would love to sneak up to those emotionless residents and trainees, knowing their hidden side that contributes to their excellence and dedications.
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